Judgement

So, I think we throw around the words judge, judgment, and judgmental too often.  Having just been through a couple of those all important (haha) and soon forgotten online arguments this is on my mind.  I have been accused of being judgmental when it comes to parenting topics.  I thought of several things I could use as an example but I think I will use circumcision, since it is one topic I am on the receiving end of the judgement.
Here is a list of things that are NOT judgement or personal attacks against me or attempts to shame me.
1. not circumcising, leaving YOUR son intact is not about me
2. stating the fact that you did not circumcise
3. making the generic statement, "circumcision is wrong", you are simply stating your beliefs which do not happen to be the same as mine
4. posting clever cartoons or slogans against circumcision or in favor of intact in your space, physical or internet (ie, your facebook page,  your blog, your bumper, your home)
5. sharing information such as articles or statistics in your space (see above)
6.  sharing information when it is asked for
7 asking questions about circumcision

Here is a list of things that ARE judgmental, inappropriate, and often mean
1. telling me I am not allowed to circumcise
2. saying circumcising makes me a bad parent
3. referring to circumcision as mutilation, child abuse, or sexual abuse
4. posting clever cartoons or slogans against circumcision in MY space (ie my facebook page, blog, bumper or home)
5. sharing unsolicited articles and statistics repeatedly in my space
6. asking "How could you do that?" or "Why would you do that" or "Don't you feel guilty?"

This basic idea could be applied to most parenting topics.  One topic that I am accused of be judgmental about is breastfeeding so I changed the list to apply to breast vs formula:

Here is a list of things that are NOT judgement or personal attacks or attempts to shame

1.breastfeeding, MY decision about my child is not about YOU
2. stating the fact that I breastfeed, how long I did it, how easy or hard it was, or how often I do it
3. making the generic statement, "breast is best"
4. posting clever cartoons or slogans about breastfeeding in MY space (ie, my facebook page,  my blog, my bumper, my home)
5. sharing information such as articles or statistics about why breast is best or the downside of formula in my space (see above)
6.  sharing information when it is asked for
7 asking questions about formula

Here is a list of things that ARE judgental, inappropriate, and often mean
1. Saying everyone has to breastfeed
2. saying only bad parents use formula
3. refering to formula as poison or bad food
4. posting clever cartoons or slogans in favor of breastfeeding in YOUR space  (ie your facebook page, blog, bumper or home)
5. sharing unsolicited articles and statistics repeatedly in your space
6. asking "How could you do that?" or "Why would you do that" or "Don't you feel guilty?"

7. saying "you should have tried harder" or commenting in any other way about your personal experience without being explicitly invited to do so

I realize this is a bit long, but this is my space, right?  I think I made my point about judgement and hope that the mom's I consider my friends can relax and enjoy each other despite the fact that we haven't all made the same decisions.