Giving Up. (or asking for help)

Earlier this year Mike and I reached an impasse.  The boys were not doing well enough in school.  Being immersed in the homeschool community (and being in a bit of denial about my own failings) I was inclined to just keep going.  To trust that they would get it in their time.  Mike, being only passively involved with homeschool and still fully attached to the grades= success motto we all grew up with was starting to worry they would be working at McDonald's in 15 years.
We were both right.  I had let things go to far.  There were some basic skills that the boys, especially Yosef were missing out on.  I did not want to admit that I just wasn't getting through to him.  After all isn't the homeschool cheer that anyone can teach their kids.  They were not going to just "get it" without a major change.  And if I was not willing to swallow my pride and admit my own failings they would suffer.  It is also true that kids learn at their own pace, and an A doesn't really mean anything.  All the reasons I decided school in general and public school most specifically were not the right place for my children were all still valid.
We both agreed public school was out.  The district we just moved into is not even state accredited.  We looked at the cost of private and quickly realized that required an income all its own.  We were blessed and grateful to discover Charity Christian Academy through a facebook connection.  (see its not all a waste  of time)  It was a real answer to prayer.  The boys are in an online school now.  They have access to a "real" teacher, and tests, and grades.  Somehow things I tried to teach Yosef a million times suddenly make sense coming from someone else.  Michael has his quantifiable results and I have the boys home with me.  It is the perfect solution for us.
This whole experience made me realize a few things.  Asking for help or using a different means of school is not giving up or admitting failure. Its just changing things, and after all isn't that one of the big benefits of homeschool that we can change things whenever we need to, even in the middle of a school year, to best suit our family and our child.  I also realized that there is a lot of pressure in the homeschool community to do it all yourself and to produce geniuses.  There is so much from the outside criticizing and comparing to brick and mortar schools that  it is almost impossible to not feel you have to prove them wrong and show you are better.  Thus we compare our children, brag of their accomplishments and always feel they must be doing better than their public school counterparts.  Within homeschool community there is a lot of criticism of other forms of school (not that we would ever say it to your face) mostly probably born of the same desire to prove ourselves.  Therefore, no one wants to admit they are taking help from  the school system or that they are considering sending their child to school.
I also realized that for me the academics were not the reason I loved homeschooling.  Having the pressure off for the math and science and being able to concentrate on what I love, extra history lessons, incorporating the Biblical feasts into our daily life, field trips, just having my kids there with me to learn life skills has been a real blessing.
I know that this is not a one size fits all solution, in fact we are not using it for Eliana and may not ever because she inst having the struggles her brothers were with book work but I learned a lot about being flexible an accepting the answer to prayer even when it isn't the one we want.  He really does know best.

Deanna Rose Children’s Farmstead

http://www.opkansas.org/Things-to-See-And-Do/Deanna-Rose-Childrens-Farmstead
We went to this pretty cool place with Susie and Sarah on Monday

Haircuts